Pager Blues

Victim(s): Would rather remain anonymous!

Story

Here are a number of quirks about club Pagers and talking to the ABC Paging company that the club uses in HK. These have all happened to people in HKJCS. Do you know who??

• It is impossible for the operator to understand how to spell your name. Popular variations of Shane include "Shina", "Shine", and "Shame". Adopt an alias like "Bob" and tell all your mates.
• If you get a pager for the first time and get a message with HSI as the first three characters and then some number, DON'T dial it. This is the Hang Sang Index stock exchange value, not normally the Director of Betting's phone number.
• Don't ask the pager company to address the note "Dear Pisspot" as they will put "Mr Pisspot", and you will look the fool rather than the recipient.
• If you manage to send a message to someone that requires them to use the scroll button and the message is intact and spelt correctly then you have attained "Page Speak Legend" status. This takes many years of practice talking to a pager operator.
• Never leave your pager on vibrate next to the bed when you go to sleep - it can frighten the #$^*! out of you at night.